Hi,
Leap year? Loafing about more like 😉
Yeah, I had Feb 29th off but more by accident than design. I had some holiday leave carried over from last year, and Thursday was booked so I didn’t lose it.
Now, I’ve been both enjoying and benefitting from a shorter working week for a while now. Okay, it’s every other Friday off, but that still helps.
It’s not just the psychological and physiological boost I get, but having the time to do things, means I can run errands and try my hand at the housework. With apologies to Ms Austen, it is a truth universally acknowledged that a man who tidies, must point it out. 🙂
But, hey, it gets done and without the burden of tiredness or the barrier of little time, dare I say, I actually don’t mind doing it so much. I know, I know, the Patriarchy Mafia will be round to tell me off, but as they’re unlikely to stop for directions and ask, I’ll be okay 😉
Coffee and kindness
Thursday was well spent meeting an old friend for coffee. M is a thoroughly good bloke and some of the things he shared with me around active listening and techniques to be curious, well, they’ve had a massive impact on my life.
They’ve certainly helped me take a more relaxed and curious approach at work, and that has shown me, that a lot of the time, we – as in people – really struggle to communicate. It’s not that anyone is bad or dumb, it’s more the same word fav man so much – and ironically, so little – to different people. However, a proverbial step back and check – or to playback an idea – seems to keep the drama at bay. That and help us all find common ground.
Likewise, using similar techniques in sensitive conversations at Chams and/or during outreach work, well those ideas have been incredibly useful.
Maybe the above speaks to my biases around discussion and compromise, or ‘teaching is in my blood’, I dunno.
Does M know about Chams and me as Lynn? No, there’s not been the right moment to tell him. In our chat yesterday, we were talking about things and as he was exploring stuff, I didn’t want to ‘topic bomb’ the conversation and make it about me. A time and a place, and all that.
Echoes
On the way to meeting M, I parked in – or more accurately, under the Victoria Centre.
As a bit of local history, decades back, their used to be a train station where the shopping centre stands now. Before the new bus station was built this century, you could look across from the bottom of the underground car park, and see the old steam train tunnel that ran under the hill to Sherwood and Carrington.
That was the first memory echo. My Dad parking at the end of the underground carpark, so we could look out across the wasteland, up the cliffs, and out to the boarded up tunnel. One of those slightly odd moments, where you’re underground, but suddenly the outside is with you. That and how can there be such a big hole in the middle of a city?
Part of me still dreams that the older railway lines might be reused to make way for tram links to the city. Mind you, that’s going to take a lot of investment and given the continued cuts to public services, we’re going to need a new government to give us that.
As a locked the electro-dad-mobile, my mind jumped back to the last time I was here. Some time last year or earlier, and I was in Lynn mode. This time, there was no echo of heels as I walked to the lift. Just the steady stomp of my boots. No flutter of nerves worrying about my safety when I’m out in bloke mode. Hello, cisgender, straight white bloke privilege.
Likewise, the walk through Boots and by the cosmetics made me smile too. Thinking of happy memories of getting advice of getting the right foundation, and the make-up artist asking where is got my nice lipstick from. Hello transgender joy and acceptance.
A good day out with new memories and recollecting older ones.
L x