Tag: Lessons Learned

Lessons Learned: Part XVII – Going bust

Lessons Learned, Uncategorized

Hi, Hopefully you’ll forgive the pun. It felt a better choice than anything to do directly with boobs or related slang terms. One of the things I find affirming about my body, is when I put my bra on and – after some careful medical tape powered scaffolding and related tweaks – I can look down to see what I think should be there. Namely, my boobs. Now, if through genetics, age, and/or just good ‘ol pot luck, there’s always been a certain amount of tissue in that department. Not quite “there are lots of people on the balcony” but enough to give things a helping hand. I mention this – not as a Ms Smug-Pants brag – but very […]

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Lessons Learned: Part XVI – The route to new

Lessons Learned, Uncategorized

Hi, If you’ve been reading YATGB, you may have picked up on my occasional ‘down the rabbit hole’ curiosity of what makes us do what we do. I guess I am trying to make sense of what it is to be trans-something-or-other, somewhere under that big ‘ol inclusive trans* umbrella of identities and possibilities. Now, two things I love – other than the perfect heel, good hair, and a lippy that stays the course 😉 – are a diagram that helps with understanding something. Think of it not so much as a map of where we are, but some things we can point at, and maybe reflect, learn, or discuss. A smart person might have said a shared metaphor, but […]

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Lessons Learned: Part XI – Avoid Purging

Lessons Learned, Uncategorized

Hi, The other day, someone asked about how they could stop purging. Okay, so first off, from a Trans community point of view, purging is all about throwing all your your clothes, shoes, wigs, and makeup away. At least for Assigned Male at Birth folk, and I would guess there’s a similar process for Assigned Female at Birth people too It typically follows periods of very low self esteem and/or high levels of guilt. What do we have to be guilty about? Oh, you just need to listen to that negative voice in your head. The one that tells you are aren’t good enough, that you’re ugly, that you’re a fake, hideous, attention seeking, a perv, etc. I would wager […]

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Lessons Learned: Part X – Things when out & about

Lessons Learned

Hi, With luck and confidence on your side, just maybe you’ll be stepping out into the world. That might be to a support group, social event, a day out, etc. Whatever it is, there’s a few key items that can help. Brolly – a fold up umbrella can help keep dry, save your wig, and provides a handy privacy of the weather turns against you. Change – have a few quid in loose coinage for parking meters, snacks, beverages, etc. Some of the fancier toilets may require you to pay, so don’t be caught short. 🙂 Exit Kit – a ‘bug out bag’ with makeup removal wipes, nail varnish remover, spare male clothes, and somewhere to store your fancier clothes. […]

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Lessons Learned: Part IX – Nails

Lessons Learned, Uncategorized

The other night after closing up Chams HQ, I was sat in my car removing my nail polish. Having fancy nails is something I enjoy and as I switched from fab to drab, I realised I’d not written anything about nails in the Lessons Learned series. First off, let’s get the usual disclaimer out of the way, in that this post is based on my own experiences in muddling through life. I am not recieving any kick backs from any products I mention. Shame, as honesty lets you sleep well, even if it doesn’t pay to keep the heating on 😉 The Choices Over the years I’ve tried the following with various levels of success and, uhh, could-do-better. 🙂 Nail […]

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Lessons Learned: Part VIII – Fake your shape

Lessons Learned, Uncategorized

Hi, In previous Lessons Learned I’ve written about various things including finding your personal style and shopping. This post (hopefully) fills a gap around building your shape. Now, that might seem a bit odd – I almost wrote nuts, but we’ll come too those later 😉 – in the idea you can build a shape. What I mean is, what are the tricks, hacks, and ProTips to help you have more of a femme figure compared to your regular figure. I will touch on FTM stuff as well, but as that’s not my area of expertise, it will be light. First off, let me a clear – oh dear, I sound like a politician about to not answer the question […]

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