Hi,A handful of weeks ago, Susie made a reference to Twelfth Night. Now, as someone who loves a good quote, I did take a look at some of The Bard’s famous lines. This one jumped out at me:

In nature there’s no blemish but the mind.
None can be called deformed but the unkind.

So, dare I suggest that kindness is cool? Going back a little further, and some readers may be aware of the sad passing of Keith Flint, the force majeure frontman for The Prodigy. It seems he was a kind fellow by all accounts.

To be kind in a world that often seems so unpleasant is, I think, an act of rebellion. When the “cool kids’ in music dissed James Blunt, Keith – from a band whose music is so very different – hugged Blunt and congratulated him. BTW, should you find yourself in need of a good laugh, James’s Twitter feed is on the right side of sharp, IMHO.

How does any of this apply to being trans? Well, in an image focused world, I think there’s a risk we focus more on passing and looking our best, than what’s going on within. I mean, if you look in the mirror and find that you’re thinking less of yourself, ask Would I say this to a friend? If someone you care for was struggling, would you point out their faults, or see if you could help? A good person, I think would not judge. Kind does not lie or delude, but looks for the good: inside and out.

Perhaps that old film had much wisdom: be excellent to reach other. Maybe the world would be better if we had more kind rebels.

Take care,

PS: A note of thanks to the Anonymous Partner who shared some of her journey a little while ago. I’m still trying to work out how to use what you put and preserve your anonymity.

PPS: I’m testing a new Contact form, so if you feel like giving it a test, that would be kind! 🙂


  1. C.S.Lewis described the world as "enemy-occupied territory" and charitable behaviour as "acts of sabotage" against it. Obviously he was writing in the context of Christianity with the backdrop of the world wars, although the image is a useful if rather negative one.

    I think it often takes a conscious effort of will to be kind, a sort of overriding of natural instinct to be selfish. Humans, almost uniquely among animals, have an ability to elect to be cruel and, horribly, about 1% of the population are born psychopaths whose nature is inherently antisocial. By the same token, though, there are people who seem to be born nice and naturally considerate and selfless.

    We are going through a patch where cruelty seems to have been chosen by a greater than average number of people and is now the norm among our toxic politicians. It's hard not to get sucked into the hate as humans are also keen to emulate one another. I'm being kind to those I love and simply ditching the haters as the effort to maintain an even keel is very stressful at present. I hope things don't get to you either.

    Sue x

    1. Are we not all heroes in our own story? 🙂 I do think that a little empathy goes a long way. As to Lewis, if he's doing kind things due to a doctrine, he is at least doing them.

      On the occasion of doing something for someone, I get a good feeling for doing so, but that's not my motivation. That's more of if that was me, I wouldn't want to struggle. The happy feeling afterwards is nice though!

      As to the Sea of Negativity we seem to be sailing through, if it's right or wrong, I've started to switch off to it. Leaving social media, muting the radio when a certain topic beginning with 'Brex' starts up, etc. Maybe I'm retreating into my safe little T friendly bubble, but honestly, I wish I knew how to push back and make a difference.

  2. Lynn, you like me and I suspect a lot of other people are switching off as we have heard enough of the appalling goings on. I'm not interested in personal politics, to my mind everyone is entitled to their opinion, I don't have to agree with it, but I do respect it. And that is the important thing, respect, that is the thing that is sadly missing from current society and it's about time people started respecting people with differing views.

    1. Respect is, I think, something that needs to be earned, and, oddly, is something that can be spent – burned even.

      The are some politics and beliefs I don't care for, but that's just my opinion… 🙂

      But, when thethe other person's view punches down, that's not right in my book. Bigots, IMO, need to be challenged. Sometimes respectfully and sometimes not. It can be a tough call to know which way to go, but I think we should all use our privilege to help those who don't have as much.

  3. So of course I put my moniker in the Search box and it came back with this post (Kindness), at the end of which you have this line
    “PPS: I’m testing a new Contact form, so if you feel like giving it a test, that would be kind”
    That link, btw, takes you back to the older blogspot site. That may be something (if you’re still using it) you might want to search for and change.
    Just noticed my last comment from testing this in Chrome was flagged as awaiting moderation, so that might explain why I didn’t see my first comment after closing and reopening the new test site.

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