Another week rolls by eh? 🙂 I had Friday and indeed this Wednesday off from blogging. Given the circumstances around our boy dog, the Ever Lovely Mrs J’s health, and indeed her Dad, sometimes, something’s gotta give.
It’s funny. I talk on here – write? 🤔 – about putting your own oxygen mask on first, yet in the flurry and fluster of life, that advice is so easily forgotten. A note of thanks to both M and A who reminded me that there’s nothing to feel guilty of in doing that. The all important step back did help. ♥️
Funnily enough I found that I missed writing – if you can say blogging is writing. Well, at least a case of keep tapping away at the keys at least. Or, for the more modern folk, swiping away at the touchscreen. 🙂
One thing I’ve noticed – and I think this applies as much as our dear old hound, as it does to things in my trans life – is deciding. Not the difficulty in doing so, but the emotional turmoil that goes on why ideas surface, flounder, and crash, before something settles. Dragged* out of the churning waters, it somehow manages to weather the emotional storm. Okay, I think that metaphor has been suitably tortured 😁
( * Sadly not in the fabulous sense of the word 😉 )
But what I’m getting at, is if I can cope with that uncertainty, the actual decision brings peace. Sure, not an easy peace, but certainly better than the grief of before. I feel it’s that magical question: what’s the least worst option? In fact, you might apply that same thought to coming out, starting to explore your gender, shaving the legs, trying makeup, or getting out.
Sometimes, doing nothing is the worst option…
Staying in a job you hate or quitting or going somewhere new that’s completely unknown? Not getting medical help when you know something is wrong, yet scared of knowing what it might lead too….
Which being us around to the trans factor 🙂 Considering we might be anything other that the mainstream cis het (cisgender heterosexual) – and for the record, that’s totally fine – can be quite a shock. I think it certainly alters your self view. But, maybe, what’s the least worst thing you can do in that situation? Experiment and experience perhaps? At least try and adjust as you learn.
So it is that we’re trying, a middle way with our dear old boy. He won’t be here forever, but if we can make his start with us a good one, we’ve done something. Hopefully the right thing to help his stay with us as best as they can be.
I spotted this in my Memory Jar app the other day:
We have light and light, we have nothing. We have dark and dark, we basically have nothing. It’s like in life. Gotta have a little sadness once in awhile so you know when the good times come. I’m waiting on the good times now.”Bob Ross
Ah, dear old Mr Ross. A man of wisdom and talent indeed. I wouldn’t say I was in the ‘dark dark’, but it could be better 🙂 I guess, I’m just looking for the twinkles of light. Moments to be enjoyed and maybe, if we look for the stars, we’ll not see the darkness ♥️
With the above in mind: there’s been good news about Grandpa J, investigations are in hand for Mrs J, and the kindness of friends helps. Look after yourselves.
PS: Apologies for anyone who read the title as Twinkies and expected pictures of snacks 😁