Work, doubt, and clothing confidence

Hi,

Another working week out of the way and we’re into the weekend! It’s been an odd one for me given the amount of time out of the office. I’ve been working, just not at my desk. Thing is, there’s this little twinge of guilt that I just can’t seem to shake. The feeling that if I’m travelling from A to B, I’m not actually doing something.

I get this sometimes when I’m working outside of the office. Maybe I’m coaching someone, or (hopefully) helping a team of people organise a project, or train them in the Tech Du Jour. The worry, if I had to give it a name, comes around like a lazy comet. I look at the thought, and it spins back out again on that long orbit.

Maybe I’ve got a hang-up from a few years of a presenteeism boss, and I’m still under that shadow more than I care to admit.

That or if I’m enjoying what I do, there’s that odd quirk that if I’m having fun, am I working? Truth is, if I feel useful, have fun, and be out and about, that’s a bucket load of win for me.

As to the work guilt, anyone else with this or is this another quirk of the Jones’ psyche? As Ron said: “mental, that one.” 😉

___

BTW, in an effort not to feel quite so ‘drab’, I’ve taken to wearing fancy shirts. Nothing too femme, if that can be said about a man’s shirt, but certainly bold, bright, or (hopefully) tastefully patterned. It seems there are two shirts in my collection that cause commentary from female colleagues (although younger male staff sometimes ask).

One lady spoke about her wish to wear brighter items but said she lacked the confidence to wear them. She looked very professional, BTW, and we had a brief chat about clothes and I found what she had to say interesting. She spoke about her dilemma of dressing so she felt confident versus wanting to look smart, but not dull.

I think I get what she means about the confidence thing. I have to be wearing something that feels ‘me’, otherwise my confidence isn’t quite there. It’s not that it’s a fragile thing, gone like a balloon in the wind, but more like the right look makes me feel right. Stuffed in a suit doesn’t work for me as a bloke, yet ironically, in Lynn mode, I’d happily wear more work orientated outfits and feel both smart and confident. Weird huh?

On a partly related note, I’ve been through a few shops looking for either white leggings (well, it is summer) and a maxi skirt in tall. I’ve not found the former, and the latter seems to be out of stock. Either I’m looking in the wrong place, or I’m just way too fussy. Actually, don’t answer that. 😉 Still, a lunchtime perusing the shops was good for the soul, if not the wallet.

Take care,
Lynn

4 Comments

  1. I so relate to, "I have to be wearing something that feels 'me'". For me, it's skinny jeans at work. Men's jeans, but quite tight. I usually wear a dress shirt with them along with a sport coat. Just this week I had to convince a group of women at work that they really were men's jeans….they were convinced I was wearing women's….not that I care at this point. Been wearing them for years. It's just a little thing that makes me feel "me"…and since I keep myself in shape, I can wear these jeans with confidence.

    Calie xx

    1. Ah yes, the requirement to stay trim because you've two wardrobes and some items are two nice not to wear. It's a struggle 😉

      Good to know you've got a style that's working for you. My jeans agenta skinny, but I've two pairs that have stretch, so feel similar. I did have some that were very lose and they felt more like somesu wife leg trousers. Too 'distressed' for work tho.

  2. Wearing the right clothes can completely boost my confidence. If I have to get on a plane then I am in full on feel a million dollar mode. Swing dress, petticoat (not the most pratical on a plane seat), bolero or jacket and heels.

    I swear people must think I am pretentious for wearing them, but they give me a something that I need to make it through the journey.

    But, oddly enough, it took me 6 months or more to get the courage to buy the first swing outfit, and I was totally faking it the first few times I wore it.

    Now it's my go to "I need courage" outfit 🙂

    Groetjes,
    Stace

  3. Pretensions, no. Fabulous, yes. 🙂 I don't know how you manage heels on a long flight tho!

    Thing is if the outfit makes you feel good and with it, who are we to say otherwise?

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