Yo, what’s happenin‘? 🙂
The ironic use of ‘street’ aside, hello peeps. I hope you’re well.
An old friend of my mum’s passed away recently leaving two (now grown-up sons in their 40s) and her husband. I was leafing through the cards in the shop, looking for one that felt right. We’re not overly close, but still, you don’t want to see the people you like get put through Life’s mangle do you?
So back to the card selection. It was a rather odd experience in that how can a card with a simple verse help? I’ve been on the receiving end of grief – as no doubt you good people have too – and as someone who’s not grieving, it feels… cheap. No, that’s not the right word; more a hollow gesture. Like shouting into the void. Equally, you don’t want to be over-the-top nor in-their-face. Some people want to talk about it, some don’t. You just don’t know do you? But negativity aside, I remember seeing all the cards sent after my sister’s death. The person you love may not be there, but I hope it shows that other people cared for them and also for the people left behind. I hope they draw some comfort from it.
F***. This is cheery, isn’t it? Okay. Let’s talk about shoes or something vapid before I well up! 🙂
Ahhh… Balls. I’d written a paragraph below about social networking (see Groundswell if you like) but it was dry and my heart just wasn’t in it. I don’t know about you, but sometimes I stall on what I want to write. I talk around the topic (like now) rather than just coming out with it. I wonder if it’s my subconscious getting the idea straight before I get to write about it.
Deep breath, Lynn.
Earlier tonight the ever lovely Mrs Jones set off for a night out with the girls. She looked fab – and I told her. New trousers, groovy top and foxy shoes. See, shoes don’t just do it for trans folk. Anyway, as I kissed her goodbye before putting the nippers to bed, I wondered if this line is true: “women dress more for each other than for men.”
I remember reading this many a moon ago and it’s one of those lines that stick in my mind. I think we all want to dress nicely if we want to seem attractive. I don’t just mean sexually attractive, but socially attractive too. Do you want to hang around someone who dresses *really* badly or who hasn’t had their yearly bath? Shallow yes, very much so, but we make all sorts of judgements about a person who appears a certain way. When we’re not so shallow, we look past the outside and deal with that person as an individual.
Heh. Somewhat amusing, here I am – your typical cross-dresser – crowing about treating people on how they dress. Mind you, you do get to experience the extremes the above. 🙂
Anyhoo, the article went on to explain itself a bit further but as I read I began to disagree. Not all men notice, but some men do. I’d wager that some trans folk do. We’re wired to take in a women’s appearance, perhaps more so that your average Joe. Of course, we’re looking with an eye of ‘that looks nice’ as much as ‘Sue looks smart today’, but there you go. 🙂
Talking as a guy, I don’t have the confidence, and perhaps this is a good thing, to say to female colleagues/acquaintances ‘you look nice today’ when they do. Not everyday stuff, but the biggies like a new look: hair, clothes, jewellery, etc. I guess it’s the fear that they’ll think I’m hitting on them in some way, so instead, I say hello and move on. The funny thing is: sometimes I’d like to. Doesn’t everyone like a genuine and deserved compliment?
That’s enough waffle from me.
[ Today’s lyric: Too Real by The Levellers ]