A small podium has been set up in front of a government building by the seaside. Press and the public are gathered around.
Robert Hooksmith, Mayor: Good morning everyone and thank you for coming to the mayoral election announcement and Q&A.
Polite applause ripples through the crowd and cameras flash.
Mayor: Thank you everyone. Through our collective hard work and effort, we’ve got Piblington on Sea on the up. Employment is much improved, the sea front has been fully restored to it’s Victorian glory, and crime & antisocial behaviour are lower year on year.
There's some muttering and shaking of heads in the crowd.
Mayor: -Ahem- I come before you today to ask that you support our party in dealing with the number one issue that affects the good people of Piblington on Sea –
Old man: Lack of care for the elderly?
Young mum: Difficulty in getting timely GP appointments?
Gentleman in a wheelchair: A lack of community transport and parking?
Young lady: The loss of the cliffs and protected marshland due to changes in the winter storms and summer droughts?
Young man in surf clothing: Is it the levels of raw sewage that plague the river and beach, making it stink like a hot Glasto portaloo?
Teenager: That most of the secondary school is closed and we’re either freezing or baking in the temporary classrooms from three years ago?
Mother with baby: Are you rejecting the Immigrant Processing Centre using the old munitions factory on the cliff? That place is unsafe and people need help, not locking up. They’re fleeing war.
Male teenager: Will you help fund meals for school kids, pensioners, and other vulnerable communities, so we don’t need the food banks?
Mayor: Thank you, good people of Piblington, yes; I’ll address all those things in time. However, before we can act on those, I ask that you put your trust in us to address the most serious issue that plagues our time: toilets.
Surfer: So you’re forcing Meadow Water to clean up it’s act? That’s a good step forward!
Mayor: Ah, not quite no. I’m currently in talks with their Director of Operations in South America.
Old Man (muttering loudly): Another free holiday then. I guess they don’t have phones or the Internet there, do they?
Mayor: Access to toilets –
Gent in wheelchair: Fantastic! Accessible public conveniences for all…
Mayor: Exactly! Accessible to everyone –
Much applause follows and the clouds break to bring out the sun
Mayor: – except trans people! For far too long, this community have caused upset and division by intruding on safe spaces, so no one feels safe using the loos.
The applause stops. The wind blows and the sun goes in. From a nearby lamppost, a seagull farts loudly.
Older lady: As a former copper, we’ve never had any complaints. We would welcome more funding to help deal with antisocial behaviour from the men who cat call, grope, and mistreat women on the beach, in the pub, or on the street.
Young dad: Hear, hear. Some perv tried it on with my teenage daughter last week. Filthy git.
Older woman: I’m more worried about going out at night now the buses have gone. I don’t care what woman sits near me in the loo, I can’t see them ‘cos all the cubicles keep us private.
Mayor: They’re quite tall these trans women –
Older woman: the cubicles are floor to ceiling. Are they going to bring a drill with them? Maybe a periscope?
Mayor: I understand your concerns and these difficult situations need to be addressed by my team and –
Teenager: So far you’ve ignored all the things we’re bothered about as a community and now you’re detailing a policy that no-one wants. Do you really expect us to vote for you?
Mayor: That’s not true. We’ve had a lot of feedback on our online consultation form –
Older woman: Probably from bots. You’ve not even got CAPTCHA or a check if your local.
Mayor: Due to budget issues, we….
Surfer: Budget cuts caused by you outsourcing the council systems, who failed to deliver, and we had to bail you out through a council tax rise!
Mayor: For legal reasons, I cannot comment on going council disputes.
Old lady, old man, and others: F***ING booooo!
Mayor: How dare you! All I want is for this community to be safe.
Various voices: We need safer streets, accessible services, abusers charged, clean water, and better schools.
Mayor: Okay, okay. I hear what you’re saying. But, why “f**king boo”?
Old lady: ‘Cos sometimes, Mr Mayor, just boo isn’t enough.
As neat a summary of the UK’s anti-trans culture war as you could want, really. Let’s hope a new government focuses on other things, although the looney right and their media buddies will not be leaving off for a while yet. Sue x
I’m just reporting what’s going on in the little seaside town, Sue. Readers are free to think of that in any way they like 😉
I’m with you on hoping a new government will be better. They’ve certainly got their work cut out after all these years of things being left to rust.
I hope that a more enlightened group starts to undo the damage caused to minority rights. Not that women should be a minority, I should add! Yet, they certainly seem to be left behind on certain areas.
I strongly suspect that nothing will come of this statement. Its a political trap designed to catch Labour out, so they make a statement to the effect that the Labour leader does not known what a woman is.
Not a very clean way to fight an election, but I am expecting more tall tales and fibs from both sides
Given the last minute restriction to blockers for trans teens by the government, and rhetoric from – the seemingly ironically named 🙄 – Equality’s Minister, I’m not so sure “it’s just a trap”.
There’s legal action against this by the Good Law Project and I believe that’s on behest of TransActual. A look on GLP’s web page will explain the legal action.
The Cass Review has, IMO, been weaponised politically. Looking at the video featuring Freddie and Abigail, they allege the government is eroding rights by subtle tweaks to rules and policy. If the allegations are untrue – and I’m not in a position to comment – there’s certainly a very strong desire to demonise and legislate against the trans community’s access to services.
Now, given I present as male and I’m a middle class white person, I’ve got a lot of privilege and safety. You might argue “well, you’re not transitioning, so this doesn’t affect you.” Arguable, but my son is transitioning, I have friends who have, and Chams has people who are. As this government creeps further right and targets those close to me, I feel the words of Niemöller’s famous poem, First They Came. Now, folk may say “Ah, that’s overreacting”, but as the ever creeping hatred steps up, it gets worse each time. Just like the lack of action and prosecution against misogynistic behaviour, predatory men know they can get away with things more and more. That is not okay.
I’ll pin my colours to the proverbial mast and say that any government that actively discriminates through rhetoric or deed, is in my view, morally questionable, and as such I question there legitimacy to rule. I expect ethical and just behaviour from those in office. Shysters, liars, bigots, and the corrupt can jog on.