A look back – April


The other day I happened to catch sight of myself during a video call and there I was: bare faced, slightly grizzled in the beard department, with thinning hair, and given the camera pickup, my eyebrows had seen better days. No wonder I feel better with my face on 🙂 So long as I don’t see myself, I’m kinda okay about my image. How I feel in my head doesn’t quite line up with reality, but so long as I don’t see myself too often, it’s okay.

One of the curious things about being Trans* – or maybe it’s just me – is wanting a picture of the night out. Maybe as a record, maybe to help fill in the downtime with memory, or maybe to look back on and push back against the occasional alien feelings around being blokey.

So it was that I wondered what had I been wearing over the last few Aprils. It seems there’s been a few changes in hair and outfit over the years. 🙂

The funny thing about those photos – other than how I look in them 🙂 – is there’s a blog post to go with each one. Reading through some of the things I’d written, some I remember, but much I don’t. Perhaps – like certain fashions or choices – such memories are best learned from but not memorised.

Lynn14 seems to be having a good time, while 13, 14, 18, and 19 have had their money’s worth with that top. Not bad for hand-me-down from the Ever Lovely Mrs J, bless her. Lynn17 might need to be careful if she bends down! 🙂

It seems I have a style when it comes to hair and it swings between brown and red. I don’t think 16 was really me, but I still love the look of my hair in 19. Maybe it’s time – when the shops open again – to get my current wig restyled.

L x


  1. All of the Lynn’s look very happy 🙂
    I like the pairing of the moneys-worth top with denim(?) and leggings in 14 particularly.

    And over here in Pandoraland, the sunshine is helping my spirits a lot. OK, a new leopardprint and maribou coat, and an occult/cute tshirt also helped. Yay retail therapy!

  2. Good to hear the sunshine and new threads are putting a spring in your step. No pun intended, mind! 🙂 The new coat sounds fab.

    No. 14 is indeed leggings and denim. I think the shorts were some jeans I shortened as they were a less than flattering straight leg. Maybe when the virus clears and there’s chance for getting out again, I’ll see if I still have the shorts…. and that I can get into them. 🙂

  3. This was fun! Your makeup really amplifies your feminine presentation. I love Lynn 16’s dress! You REALLY seem to love that corner!

    1. Thanks Joey. Makeup really helps, I feel, and that’s around confidence as well as changing how you look.

      The dress belongs to the Ever Lovely Mrs J who offered a loan. There’s are times when I can’t decide what to wear and if I get stuck, my amazing wife helps.

      As to the corner, it’s got fairly good lighting and it’s out of the way. We used to have a tall rack/stand with a cream coloured sheet as a backdrop, but somehow that was lost. The only snag with the stand was it was a faff to assemble at the end of the night.

  4. Lovely to look back, Lynn. I’ve said it so often before but I will say it again, your style is authentically feminine. None of the suspenders and miniskirts so beloved of transgender selfies!

    Out of curiosity, does that brown floral top pop up here four times out of sheer coincidence or is there something about it that suggests spring to you? To me the colours are autumnal (despite the flowers) so I find it interesting how differently we might perceive things.

    Keep on looking after your health in these odd times. Sue x

  5. That’s very kind words, Sue – and not just about saving the world from me being seen in stockings and a miniskirt. 🙂 It’s not for me.

    Hmmm. Does the top suggest spring? Well, I guess I would have to say no. I think it’s more that the material is fairly thin, so it’s more an early Autumn or Easter time choice. Plus, I think my colour choices mean towards those shades and I’ve not yet switched to the Spring favourite of white and navy that seems to do the rounds. Not that there’s anything wrong about it, it’s more than if you have nice items already, it’s a shame not to enjoy them. Plus, save the planet and all that.

    I hope things are getting better where you are. L x

  6. Hi Lynn,
    Looking through your lovely pictures, I think I am a fan of 14, 15 and 16.
    14 for the lovely smile and that super top, 15 because you look so natural and 16 it is such a lovely party dress.
    Best Wishes,
    Penny from Edinburgh

    1. Thanks, Penny. That’s very kind of you to say so. I’m thinking of shortening my hair a little – at least, once lockdown is over 🙂 Hope you’re keeping well.

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