Hi,
Like technology and government funding, the hot weather has only just reached the East Midlands. 🤪 Okay, that’s enough about politics and the weather. How’s things with you, dear reader?
Crackers
With the rise in pollen my body has been kind to me by going into immune system high alert. I mean, nevermind the lurking remains COVID19, summer colds, and pollution: look out for grass & flower dust! The nefarious menace that runs rampant in our countryside, parks, and gardens! Be gone microscopic terror! Back to the petals and plants that spawned you! -ahem-
To that end, I retried some over the counter hay fever relief tablets… and I won’t be taking that brand again. Last summer when I tried them, I found I was excessively tired and a bit… discombobulated. Yeah, but that was a year ago, and who knows if it was something else, right? So, yeah, I thought I’d give them a go again.
This time around, I found myself being – how to say this? – the wrong side of twitchy. Overly anxious and very easily distracted. Not really myself and, yes, my family – bless them – did point this out. So, I – and do make your own jokes here – stopped taking the tablets earlier this week.
Perhaps it’s coincidence, but the tiredness and, more importantly, the cat-like attention span have both departed. Good news for my mental health worries and I guess I can send that stick with elastic and fluffy mouse back. 😸
News
I am torn about writing this. So I’ll see where this goes as I type.
It is difficult to escape the toxicity of discrimative narrative. I guess it’s a bit like hanging out as a kid with your favourite older relative. Dear old Uncle Ken or Auntie Karen will drop in with “Yeah, well it’s because of those [insert racial/homophobic/sexist slur] of course.”
Umm, WFT?! A moment in which you pause and reflect on A) how did they get there, given we were talking about ice-cream and the park. B) why don’t I feel this is okay? C) what happened to those favourite phrases of certain grown-ups: don’t be rude, don’t judge other people, and be kind to others? Hmm… Now we see the violence inherent in the system! 😁
But of course, I would say this, being part of the tofu eating wokerati, with my flexitarianism, electric car, Guardian subscription, transgender nature, LGBTQ+ equality wants, recycling, parent to a trans child, left-wing Blobness, Remainer, former Satan bother RPG geek & metal fan, but I digress! 😉
Yeah, so the hate-dressed-as-concern continues writ large in British and American life. I’m not on social media – unless blogs count still? I don’t know, I’m an Old 😉 – but the news is hard to escape completely.
Maybe I’m wrong, but part of me feels I am dancing on, while the flames rise around.
Yes, I’m safe in my quiet, rural middle-class bubble and out-of-the-way, off-the-RADAR support group. But for how long? Isn’t that how bad things happen? When you don’t stand by your community? Cue poem…
First they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out—because I was not a socialist. Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out—because I was not a trade unionist. Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out—because I was not a Jew. Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.Martin Niemöller
If you think I’ve popped on a tinfoil hat, may I point out the removal of womens’ access to abortion in the US, the banning of drag shows (or performing while dressed famboyantly. What, Lady Gaga is the new public enemy?), removal of access to health for trans youth, blocking access to hormones for trans people, the on-line pile-ons and intimidation of queer people by haters, etc. Yeah, that’s the US at the mo.
What about the UK? Well, there’s the ongoing demonisation of people like me and our son. Not just in the press, but from ministers and other public figures.
Former employees have been raising concerns around the Equality and Human Rights Commission (EHRC) being less than neutral (as in aligning with government, rather than acting as a watchdog). Plus there’s allegations of bullying, although these are currently on hold. Feel free to look into that online should you wish.
This week I see the government wanting schools to grass – sorry, ‘share with parents’ – if their child wants to use new pronouns or identify as a different gender.
Now, if Child 2.0 had taken that option, how might I feel as a parent? Well, I think I could understand why he might have felt that was his only choice. I would be saddened thinking that he felt he couldn’t be open about who he needs to be, but I would not judge him. He’s our child, my son; and I love him. Heh, but given I’m not out to him, that would be a double standard! 🙂
But not all kids have understanding, supportive, or tolerant parents. Yes, even now… and perhaps especially now.
Hell, I came from the 70s & 80s, where you could be beaten up for ‘being a poof’. A broad catch all of any perceived gayness and/or effeminacy if you were a guy.
Newsflash: LGBTQ+ people are what they are. We will be who we need to be, even if it has to be secret. We exist and we are valid.
Troubling times…. and I did say I wasn’t sure about writing it. Bugger 🙄
Down the rabbit hole
I’ve spent most of my evenings enjoying a replay of a favourite game, Skyrim. A break from the online world and television as well.
Much fun and respite can be gained from gaming, IMO. Playing a character that looks as I often feel, well, it’s calming and soothing too. I know it’s not real and yet it helps.
To those of you I owe an email too, I’m sorry and I will get back to them when I can.
Thursday
In more positive news – despite the Nottingham traffic’s best efforts – I arrived at Chams HQ and brief table shuffle later, was ready to, uhh, get ready. I’m afraid I didn’t unstack and put all the chairs out, so whoever did: thank you!
The evening was fairly busy, with some returning new folk, regulars, and some from yesteryear. As I’ve said before it’s good to meet new people and catch up with those who’ve been away as well. I guess that’s one of the many good things about the group. The regularity means there’s a time to pop in when you have a mo, and say hi.
Conversation was suitably random – and I wouldn’t have it any other way! 💜 – and, of course, the thorny issue around rights came up. I mean, how can it not? When people are activately campaigning to reduce your rights and those of your family & friends, the targeted community is going to feel it. On the upside, at least we have each other and allies. 💜
Like I said, it’s not easy to ignore the news & politics, and I’m not sure that right now we should. Not easy at the mo to be trans, even as a part timer like myself. Oh, and apologies to those who don’t like that term: I am always trans, if you take the word to be an umbrella term, but as someone who presents as male nearly 99.9% of the time*, I’m not ‘full time’ as in transitioning socially or otherwise.
( * Maths wizkids, please don’t write in with how much percentage I appear in Lynn mode. I’m not great with numbers. Ask me one about something geeky… or how to accessorise 😉 ).
As the clock marched on towards 11, it was time for a quick round of photos and ensure those who wanted some taken, were included. Thanks as per Val and I hope things pick up soon, Mrs 💜
Yes, I am wearing sunnies in the photo, and no, I didn’t wear them all evening. 😎
Oh, and I bought some new sandals from Vinted – so new to me at least. I think I may take the plunge and try to resell a few shoes that aren’t quite working for me. It would clear some space and help with the recycling I guess.
It was all over including the good natured shouting, and off home we went.
L x
Its annoying and irritating and the UK appears to be importing so many problems commonly associated with the USA.
Indeed. A raft of populism and, seemingly, hostile rhetoric around anyone who is not white, male, and straight.
Given the recent legal proceedings, I am hopeful the tide is drawing back.
I had in mind the BLM movement and the underlying police bigotry that makes such movements a unfortunate requirment in the USA.
But your right we not need to import the tripe that GOP and that vulgar oaf seem to believe in.
Please note that not every ‘white male straight’ is an enemy some of us object to the pure poison that some of news organs pump out.
Yes, the US and the police record of how many of them treat people of colour is wrong on so many levels.
The BBC programme: How Hip Hop Changed the World (link below) covers… I’m not even sure I can summarise this. Umm. It’s decades of willful neglect, dodgy politics, and brutality.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p0dj6ysm
The programme is enlightening – even if you’re not a fan of the music – it’s an amazing series. In places, deeply moving and troubling on how a community can be treated so badly by those in power.
Yes, straight, white men are not the enemy. It’s those who want to remove rights for anyone who is not white, straight, cisgender, and male, who are the problem.
Loved your summery outfit, you looked fab.
Selling on vinted, is this allowed !! – not actually done this myself yet.
I did buy two more pairs on it yesterday though…
Thank you, Izzy. Thanks really kind of you.
If it’s on the “it’s okay” list, I better crack on with the photos. Both items are summer-ish / wedding, so now seems the time.
Lovely skirt, Lynn.
If anything I spend even more time than you locked in bloke mode.(Well, some of the time it feel like locked, but a lot of the time it’s more a lazy default.) But I got out today a couple of times, though of course I chose the hottest day of the year, which wasn’t the most comfortable.
As the the trans debate*, while we may not all be open or confident enough to face off directly against the haters and critics, we do what we can gradually in more personal ways. Showing love, support, and acceptance for our families, friends and colleagues and other LTGBT folk. It may feel like little things, but little and often can add up.
(*what other minority group would anyone dare ‘debate’ their right to define who they were, or even their existence? How did we get to this state without anyone drawing the obvious parallels?)
Haters won’t stop hating, but perhaps we can still hope at some point the silent majority of fair minded folk will wake up and say, “No, this is just not acceptable. It’s not who we are.”
I think there was an article on Pink News that framed “the debate” in a similar way. If someone was to say ‘how do you solve the gay/black/Jew issue?”, folk would be on top of that like ton of bricks.
How has it got to this state? I think a mix of hostile political rhetoric, the right wing media, funding from organisations that want to roll both LGBTQ+ and womens’ rights back. A toxic blend that’s hidden behind the false façade of “free speech”.
Again, it’s a rerun of the Section 28 bigotry that demonised lesbian, gay, and bi people as predators and/or the nonsense that kids exposed to positive & inclusive media would ‘be on the turn’. We know this is a crock of sh*”
Good to hear you managed to get out & about – even if it was on a hot day. I hope that helped give you some respite.
I caught up with watching Gender Wars yesterday, which centred on Kathleen Stock’s comments and the reaction of the trans community, and how activists on both sides have dug in so securely that they can no longer see or talk to the other side and can only resort to lobbing bricks. With one exception, where a transwoman and a gender critic decided to meet and talk and explain their concerns to each other (while still disagreeing) but without name calling or vilifying each other. And, significantly, one to one, without a third party trying to stir up confrontation. But sadly, those rare discussions are buried under the weight of misinformation, abuse and slogans.
Thanks, Susie. I wonder if the taking points, so to speak, have been pushed into a rigid binary? The false arguement of “all or nothing” as that helps drive the agenda of fear. “These people are coming to take away blah” or “You cannot be safe until this group are stopped…” etc.
I do think there are outside forces pushing the anti-LGBTQ+ agenda via stealth: funding, introducing groups to each other, etc.
Have things degenerated to the Leave/Remain levels or perhaps worse? Perhaps best not to look too closely.
I think that discussion around providing protection for people can be done and not at the cost of one community over another.
If we ignore trans rights for a moment, and look to pay equality for women or BLM: framing those as “yeah, but team A will lose out of we give team B what they want” isn’t true nor helpful.
I think pushing rhetoric to “you will not get that job because you’re not blah” is trick to pull people in to blocking equality and progress for everyone.
Groovy outfit, Seventies Girl 🙂
Prime Minister Theresa May, psychotically deranged though she was, was somehow persuaded by the then Equalities (and Women’s and Education) minister, Justine Greening, that trans people deserved better rights. That was killed by Brutish Johnson, Liz Crass and Richy Scrotesack and, in the last four years, the increasingly positive situation for trans people there had been before has turned into open season against them. The history of persecution of minorities always has the same progression, starting with the smallest and weakest communities and building up to eradicating entire nations. So destitute boat people and nervous trans people are now the start of the British supremacist campaign, like Russia is now exterminating Ukrainians, Chinese are suppressing Uyghurs and Indian Hindus are persecuting their Muslims. I’m not sure why neo-Imperialism and fascism have exploded in the last decade, but much violence lies ahead. The one saving grace for trans people is that the overwhelming majority of them are still hidden away in their homes or just appearing in dedicated clubs. The numbers directly affected by current hate trends is just a few thousand people like you and me. It’s horrible for those few, of course, but transgenderism will continue as it’s always done because, as we know, being trans has nothing to do with personal choices, lifestyles, etc. Dealing with current British transphobia is now tied in with dealing with Britain’s collapsing constitution and self-image. At least Johnson and his moron-in-tow, Nadine Dorries, quit last night.
Best wishes to you and your family.
Sue x
Groovy, baby! ☮️ The skirt is a wrap around number. V useful if one’s outfit requires additional space from tucking in your top…. or middle aged spread in my case! 😁
Yes, oddly May was quite inclusive around LGBTQ+ rights. I believe Marriage Equality arrived under Cameron’s tenure as well. Yet, the current lot… They need to go and we deserve better.
Oh, taking of which, there’s a good news item in Pink News about a local Nottingham MP, Nadia Whittome.
https://www.thepinknews.com/2023/06/09/labour-nadia-whittome-conservative-demands-lgbtq-protection/
Thanks for the well wishes. I hope you’re keeping cool over in EU land 🇪🇺
FWIW, part-time and full-time are all about context. This context is more than fine. Because, obvs, I have final say on word choices (that was heavily dippped in sarcasm, by the way, and self-deprecation).
You looked most fab in your Chams garb and I am glad that it went well. Necessary relief from the rounds of hate, methinks. It’s all the more frustrating as many allies simply don’t register the hate, it’s subtle like that. It’s not their fault, it’s how hate movements operate, it’s why they even exist as they do – can’t get away with being fully known from the start – build the herd mentality that the victims are over-reacting first!
Anyway, now I am over-egging puddings!
I, for one, welcome – and give praise, to the Official Definer of Things 😁
Thanks for the kind words re the outfit. If temperatures continue to rise, it may be a while before I feel up to dressing. Gah, down with Climate Change! Boo!
Yes, it’s not always easy on the ally front. I say that as someone who’s the T part of the LGBTQ+ awesomeness, but I’ve fairly limited knowledge of LGBQ experiences or that of People of Colour.
I tend to go with “could I imagine this being said on GoBsh##e Views?” If yes, it’s probably unkind, inaccurate, and a good idea to question/challenge it 😉