Not if, but when

It seems, there’s a meme for everything these days and a few years back, I saw the one below.

Being a right soft bogger or highly empathic – pick a term, I’m easy either way – the above picture… hit me quite hard. Possibly because I can see multiple sides to that story. The owner left behind, the dog leaving them behind, and so the loss is writ large.

As much as I try to be a glass half full kinda person, there are some things that can be quite the ‘heavy lift’ to haul over to the bright side.

My family are okay, let’s clear that one up. It’s our lovely boy dog who is not well. He seems well in himself, so he’s not in pain, bless him. ♥️ However, he has developed a condition that means he has months with us, rather than the years we’d hoped for.

I am… all over the place emotionally. He’s still with us and for that, I’m grateful…. and yet I feel the ticking of the proverbial clock, knowing that he will be gone, quite probably before the year is out. I hate this. I hate it, knowing that he’ll go even though I know in my heart and my head, that death comes to us all at some point.

My beautiful, wise Mrs J tells me kindly that we should enjoy the time we have with him, cherish the memories we have, and know that as a rescue dog, we gave him a happy home for over half his life. Walks, treats, plenty of fuss, comfy beds, a family, and other dogs who accepted him, etc.

Just writing down the above helps a little. For anyone wondering why I’m sharing this, writing helps me make sense of things. I think that’s always been part of blogging for me; the process of getting the brick filled tumble drier in my head to still.

I think I may have to focus on each day with him and think not what I’ll lose as he goes, but what I gained with him here. Our dear old boy lead me out of the dark woods all those years ago. He bonded with me, met me when I came home, accompanied me on long walks, chased rabbits in the garden, and sat with me on cold nights, his head on my lap while a film played on. It’s a cliché that a dog can be a person’s best friend, but that didn’t stop it being true.

So, he’s to you my best boy dog. Let us hope for a long, lazy day before the sun sets. ♥️

L x